Not a charm!

So, third time was not the charm! We are not pregnant. Their is a big story with this one though. I went in to have the IUI done on Thursday. By Friday afternoon I was starting to hurt. It was just like the pain I had with my cysts. By Saturday morning I could hardly move it hurt so bad. But I had a beading watch party @ 2, so I had to clean the house. Ryan was nice and helped. But, then he left with Brynlee because he didn't want to be here for the party. I took medicine and tried my best not to look like I was hurting. The party went well, but I was so cold. When everyone left, I took my temp. It was 103.2! I was shocked. So I took more med and fell asleep. It was only 5:30p.m. But I slept till Ryan got home @ 7. I told him I wanted a blessing, because I was really afraid what was going on inside my body. I was worried the temp would kill any chance I had. So He gave me one and I went to bed. The next morning I still had a temp and I was still in pain, but it had decreased a little. I went to Sacrament, but it really hurt to sit there, so I left and went home and napped more. I called my co teacher to tell her to come in for my early shift and I would try to be their by her normal time.
Monday morning came with my fever braking and the pain subsiding a little more. So I did go to work holding my side to control the pain. I called my Doctor and he didn't like what I said and wanted me to come in right away.
He did an exam on me and ordered some blood work and an ultrasound. So I basically spent all of Monday in waiting rooms. He wanted me to come back after my tests.
At my ultrasound I could see a tiny little sac that the tech measured. I asked her what it was, and she ignored me. When I got to the Doctors office he told me I had Hyper stimulated Ovaries. He said it is so rare that they never even warn people of the possibility of it with comid. So I asked if the chance this go round was over due to the fever and everything else and he told me that he really hesitates to tell me the next part. He told me about the tiny sac that they saw on the ultrasound was consistent with an early pregnancy. He told me I could be pregnant right now, so to take it really easy because it might not stick. I of course couldn't hold back my tears. I was so excited for the chance to be pregnant. He told me if it didn't work he would let me try again with a different drug called femara. He also told me he would let me take a pregnancy test early. So he ordered one for Friday.
I tried to take it easy all week, and when Friday came I was so excited to hear the confirmation that I was pregnant, but instead they told me I was not. They said I was at a 2 when you need to be over a 19 to be pregnant. I wasn't expecting that. They told me their was a tiny chance it could be wrong so to call when I started or if I didn't. So I cried and called Ryan to tell him.
Then I chose to believe that the test was wrong and that Heavenly Father could make the miracle happen.
But then Thursday night I started and I knew I was not pregnant. At least it gave me time to pull myself together before having to call the Doc the next morning. So on Monday I start Femara and get to have another try. He told me that I could get Hyper stimulated Ovaries again, but a lot of people who don't get pregnant on Clomid get pregnant on Femara. So I pray that I can become pregnant and get off this horrible roller coaster of emotions!!!!!!
It really sucks to think you might be pregnant only to find out it didn't take. It makes me really sad and makes me wonder what I am doing wrong. I know we need Heavenly Fathers help to make this work and I really hope that his timing will line up with ours soon. I really don't think I can handle much more of this. Plus I wonder what I did wrong to not let that last one stick. Should I have taken the whole week off and just lied in bed? These are some of the things I wonder.
At least I do have another shot at this. So keep those prayers coming in for us, we need them. I also need prayers of comfort to try to keep myself together here. It really sucks not feeling normal. I want my body to work the right way. I know we all get our trials in life and that they will make us stronger, but I also know sometimes you hit rock bottom before feeling better. I don't know where I fall in this.